I am 30!!!

Koreans celebrate their birthdays at the New Year. Since babies here are considered a year old at birth, that makes any Westerner a year older when they arrive here. My birthday is in March, yet it's not as important in Korea. Nevertheless, the birthdays are still celebrated. If I am in the West in 2010 I can turn 30 twice.

Following God's Plan

I recently returned to Korea after two years away. I did it because I missed the place. I also felt that most likely God wanted me to come back. I am hoping I got that right.
So much confuses me about what to do with my life. I had been an English major. There's not a whole lot anyone can do with that degree alone. I wish I had another major or a master's degree already. I would feel much better.
A few weeks before I came back to Korea I was starting to have second thoughts. I was asking myself just why I was going back. "Is this a dead end?", I was telling myself. I was then wondering why I wouldn't just get on with my life.
Yet, if God wants me somewhere, it's not a dead end. It's just part of God's plan.
I have thought of going back to Andrews University later in order to finally get my master's degree. So much I have also thought of other things. For years I have thought of moving to another Western country like England or Canada. I am open to many places though. I just want to find out where God wants to lead me. That's what I should do, I shouldn't be anxious about anything.

'Many are unable to make definite plans for the future. Their life is unsettled. They cannot discern the outcome of affairs, and this often fills them with anxiety and unrest. Let us remember that the life of God's children in this world is a pilgrim life. We have not the wisdom to plan our own lives. It is not for us to shape our own future. "By faith Abraham, when he was called to go out into a place which he should after receive for an inheritance, obeyed; and he went out, not knowing whither he went" Hebrews 11:8
Christ in His life on Earth made no plans for Himself. He accepted God's plans for Him, and day by day the Father unfolded HIs plans. So should we depend upon God, that our lives may be the simple outworking of His will. As we commit our ways to Him, He will direct our steps.
Too many, in preparing for a brilliant future, make an utter failure. Let God plan for you. As a little child, trust the guidance of Him who will "keep the feet of His saints". 1 Samuel 2:9. God never leads His children otherwise than they would choose to be led, if they could see the end from the beginning and discern the glory of the purpose which they are fulfilling as co-workers with Him.'
--Ministry of Healing, page 207

Back in the Land of Morning Calm

Today I returned to Korea. I flew out of Hartford, Connecticut and then to New York City, and from there I went to Korea. I am now temporarily staying in the SDA apartments near Sahmyook University. I have already gone to the supermarket and then started seeing many familiar groceries I used to get two years ago. I had forgotten some of those already. I had some pizza with corn on it. I never had that before Korea, but it doesn't taste bad.
Well, hello again Korea, I love you. I will see how long I'll stay by seeing how things go. A year or two will be good. Part of me doesn't want to ever leave, but yet I do tell myself that eventually I will have to move on.

Corn Chowder (a popular New England stew)

6 ears of fresh corn or 3 cups frozen whole corn
1/2 cup chopped onion (medium)
1/2 cup chopped green pepper
1 TBSP cooking oil
1 cup cubed, peeled potato (1 medium)
4 TSPS all-purpose flour
1/4 TSP salt
1/4 TSP black pepper
1 1/2 cups milk
2 TBSP bacon (fake for me)
2 TBSP fresh parsley (optional)

In a large saucepan cook onion and sweet pepper in hot oil until the onion is tender, but not brown. Add the potato. Bring to a boil. reduce heat. Simmer, covered, for ten minutes. Stir in corn. Cook, covered, about ten minutes more or until potato and corn are tender, stirring occasionally.
In a small bowl combine flour, salt, and pepper. Stir milk into flour mixture, add to corn mixture in saucepan. Cook and stir until slightly thickened and bubbly. Cook and stir for one minute more. Add crumbled bacon, beat through. If desired, garnish each serving with parsley.

I have had corn chowder without bacon pieces before, so I don't think they are always necessary. The imitation bacon bits are good though.

Fortune Cookie Fortune

I received this one: "Be mischievous and you will not be lonesome".

Saying Goodbye to My Church

This morning was very snowy. The snowstorm started yesterday and dumped a lot of snow on the ground. I had to shovel the driveway. Both cars were buried up to the wheels. I was sure church would be cancelled. The phone call from one of the church members said that church would start at 11 am. I was glad that there will still be church because it is the last Sabbath before I go back to Korea. When I arrived at church there weren't many people there. It was very cold outside but the inside was warm. We were going to watch a Shawn Boonstra video, but the church members decided there would be only Sabbath School. I was tired from all the shoveling and daydreamed a bit during the lesson. I also couldn't sleep well last night.
After dinner the church decided to have prayer for me in the sanctuary. It was nice of them. I felt sad and nearly cried, yet I know things will work out well. Betty, my adopted grandmother held my hand and Roy, the head elder held my other hand. I hugged people and said goodbye. It was nice to have a little group there. One woman, Sharon, is moving to Florida and I don't know when I'll see her again. I wished her a nice life there.
I know I will miss my church family, but life will go on as it has before each time I have left my home church. It was always hard to leave, but afterwards I would only hear from a few people. That's the way it is.

Neuroscience of Creativity

This is the first of 7 videos of a talk on neuroscience. It doesn't speak about creativity right away. It says that the more enriched an environment is, the more dendrites and connections the brain has. I remember that sort of lesson in high school. That's why I think that someone's I.Q. isn't completely genetic, and the more enriched their environment is at an early age, the better brain they will have. I do think that people can raise their own intelligence, yet not drastically.
The speaker said that those people with AD/HD are often that way because they are subject to many hours of television and video games. The constant flashing colors and changing scenes cause their brains to want constant change. The main reason is that they are watching a scene and not being directly part of it. Reading a book isn't the same because we get more absorbed in it. I do think having a screen culture has made our brains different than people's before.
I have wondered if something such as AD/HD exists. It's not a real condition, but something as a result of other things. Too much stimulation and anxiety reduce attention spans. People of above average intelligence are always seeking stimulation and get bored easily when something doesn't interest them. I think that it's sad that so many children are put on drugs for AD/HD and they have other conditions or are even gifted.

Prize Pigeon

This pigeon was "best of show" at the 199th Brooklyn Fair last summer. It seemed to know it too. It was strutting around proudly and eventually started pecking at my camera.

"The Road Not Taken"
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leave no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost

This poem made me think a lot before I went to Korea. The part that reads "yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back" stands out. What should my next adventure lead me to? Where will it take me beyond Korea?

Nathan's anniversary

Today is the anniversary of Nathan's death. He died in a car accident nine years ago today. He wasn't a boyfriend of mine, but I had wished he was one. I liked him a lot. He was a very kind person and very fun. I don't believe he ever realised how much he was loved by many people. He was very intelligent and I could talk to him about many subjects. He studied computer technology at Andrews University. He wanted to go to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology to study robotics. Nathan also liked to do many outdoor activities.
On the day he died there was some snow and ice outside and he went out to run an errand for a friend. On the way back his car slid into a bus and he was killed instantly. I didn't find out about his death until later that night because I had been so busy writing exams. I must have cried for two hours. I took a rag that I had been cleaning my dorm room with and put it to my face to soak up my tears. He was supposed to go home the next day for the Christmas holidays. There must have been at least 300 people at his memorial service which was held on Dec. 31, 1999. My tears still stain the bulletin from his service that I saved in my yearbook. I can't wait to see him again in Heaven. I know he loved Jesus. I will put the photo up here soon.

18th century gravestones

I've bid the world adieu, and you my friend. Here I sleep and my instruction ends.
Behold this pious soul has fled and now is numbered with the dead.
I noticed they are the graves of Ebenezer and Lucy Grosvenordale. I wonder if they had anything to do with the nearby villages of Grosvenordale and N. Gros.

Church today

Today I went visiting another SDA church. I went to the church at 2 Airport Drive in Worcester. There were few people there because of this week's ice storm. I used to attend that church when I was a kid. I also went to the church school there for first and second grade. I went into my old classroom. Suddenly memories started coming back. It looked so different, yet I could see how it was twenty years ago in my mind. There were a few computers in the room. When I was a student there were none, and only one in the other classroom - good ol' Commodore 64 with floppy disks and a square mouse.
The old set of encyclopedias from 1988 were still there. I used to look at those a lot during my free time. The old reading books were also still there, the same ones I used. They were very worn. There I was, a small child and reading encyclopedias for fun when others were still learning how to read.
I took a walk behind to the church to the stream. I used to go there alone during recess sometimes. I liked to watch the water. I couldn't get to my exact favourite spot because there was lots of ice and some thorns had overtaken the old pathway.
I will be going to Boston to pick up my visa next week. I can't wait.

Misconceptions I Had About Korea

Before I went to Korea I had some ideas on what it would be like there. There were some ideas that were wrong.

#1. I thought there would be lots of vegetarian food. I found out that vegetarianism is only common among monks. The diet is heavy in seafood (which didn't surprise me) but also in pork, beef, and chicken.
#2. I thought I wasn't going to be short. I thought that most Korean women would be about my height. In reality, nearly every adult student I had was taller than me. Only the older ladies are shorter than me, and I think it's because of the lack of nutrition they had during the Korean War and Japanese occupation. I think I am the average height of most Chinese women.

Einstein Quote

I believe that the horrifying deterioration in the ethical conduct of people today stems from the mechanization and dehumanization of our lives--the disastrous by-product of the scientific and technical mentality nostra culpa. Man grows cold faster than the planet he inhabits.
I do think that being away from the natural world has been making people grow colder to each other. I think that being in nature reduces stress greatly. Exercise makes our minds clearer. Fresh air does the same. I remember going to teach in Kwangju, Korea after being in Seoul for over a year. The change in the air was different, it suddenly made me sleepy. My then-roommate Mimie told me that when her friends went to visit her from Seoul, they also felt sleepy. The instant fresher air had a calming effect.
I know that colours have an effect on people's moods. Green and blue are calming colours. Greys are depressing. Could it be that is the reason why so many people are chronically depressed, especially during winter months?
About four years ago I went to visit the Amish in Pennsylvania. The tour guide said that being in their valley will make us feel more tranquil. It was true. There I saw hard-working people with large families who were cheerful. The children were rambunctious yet still polite. In the culture I was raised in, people with one or two children were very stressed out with balancing parenthood with jobs. It makes me wonder how our way of life has to do with stress levels more rather than the amount of responsibilities we have?

Handel's "Messiah"

Yesterday I went to church. The guest speaker was a senior theology student from Atlantic Union College. He did seem to have his heart in the right place, but I couldn't get into his sermon well. He started talking about baseball in relation to someone named Elias and I tuned him out. I don't understand baseball all that well. What was he talking about?
I later sat near him and his girlfriend and other people at the dinner table. His girlfriend was interesting. She was pretty, with coffee-coloured skin and dark hair. She was born in Mozambique to a local mother, lived in Johannesburg in SA, also in Italy because her father is Italian, and studied in Brazil for five years. She is now at AUC and dating her handsome red-haired man from Vermont. I do think it is awesome for her to be so cultured. I am glad for the exposure to other cultures I have had in my life.
After church I took a nap and then went to Victoria's Station after sunset. I read some more on my Einstein biography. He fell in love with Mileva Maric mostly because she was someone who shared his interest in science. His family was angry at him for liking her because she wasn't pretty and was sickly. He loved her because he loved her mind. To me, that made enough sense. I think romantic love should be a sort of higher friendship and do we not choose our friends based on common ground?
I later walked down the street to the Congregational church to listen to Handel's "Messiah". I hadn't listened to the entire thing live before, and I was in for a real treat. It was lovely. The church was crowded, yet I shared a pew with only one person. The organ sounded like a harpsichord and was accompanied by two violins and an electric cello. I loved that cello, I am not sure if I've heard an electric one before. It was great.

Going to the dojang

Last night I went over to the local dojang to learn some moves before going to Korea. I learned some very basic blocking, kicking, and punching. I need to work on my flexibility some more. I have basically good flexibilty already, just not excellent. Everything seemed awkward, but everything is awkward at first. I am planning on studying Taekwondo while in Korea. I will do the best I can and move up through the most levels I can while abroad.