Wanting Something and Then Not Wanting It

When I was in high school I had a teacher, Mrs. M., whom I had for Advanced Placement World Literature. In class one day, I remember the conversation going towards how often people want something so badly, and then realize later on that they don't want these things after all. I don't remember which book we were reading, or how the conversation turned that way. Mrs. M. said that she had a friend who wanted a baby very badly. She was married and never had any children. She was completely obsessed with having a baby. Her longing was so severe that she could not even walk past the infants section at a department store without bawling her eyes out. Her husband finally had enough of her emotional distress and divorced her over it. Eventually, the woman met another man and they began dating and later got married. Then, finally, she got pregnant. She was elated. Then Mrs. M. did not see the woman again until the child was turning two years old. (This makes me think that the woman likely worked at the school and quit her job to raise her child). Mrs. M. asked the woman how she liked motherhood. "I HATE IT!" the woman exclaimed. "This is twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, and I have no time to myself!" Mrs. M. said she just wanted to slap her. If that friend of Mrs. M.'s had not wanted a baby that badly, and learned to be happy without having a baby, then she could have saved herself a lot of grief. She could have saved her first marriage. She not have spent all those years dealing with extreme emotions that sent her over the edge. Then, she would not have had that child that she regretted. I can only guess that her second marriage likely did not work out, either. I just hope her son or daughter turned out all right. I have been out of high school for more than twenty years now and this is something I have remembered. People often want something so badly, and then realize they don't want it anymore. How often have people studied for a career, only to realize that they don't like it? Sometimes people get stuck in those careers because life happens and they get older, and they can't go back to school again. How many people get married each year, thinking they wanted to get married, and later regret getting married? How many people have children and then wish they did not become parents, as the case with Mrs. M.'s friend? It is very unfortunate. How many college students have studied for a program and then wish they had chosen another degree instead? I have often known of people who moved somewhere, only to regret moving to that area because they did not realize what it would really be like to live there. It is important that we think things through. We must think about what it would mean for us if we get what we want. What do we have to do to get there, and what that will cost us. And what will we do once we attained what we wanted. We cannot dwell on regrets. Sometimes we can turn things around, but sometimes we cannot.